Eat Your Heart Out, Papa Murphy's

About the only time I see "normal" broadcast television programming is when I'm running at the gym between those family-friendly hours of 7 and 10 a.m. The national morning news/infotainment programs of the former Big 3 are as incredibly inane as ever, nor have the commercials really changed since the time I was a kid. "Convenience" is the label they give so many of the products advertised, and now that no one apparently cooks from scratch, the morning commercials love to flog the latest in convenience, "almost homemade!" meals.

Thus we get from Papa Murphy's the jack-o-lantern pizza for the low, low price of $6.99. (At least that's the price in the Central Texas market.) Nothing says Halloween like a crappy pizza with oily cheese, oily pepperoni and a token pair of black olives. Woo-woo.

Yeah, I figured the boys would love it.

But there's no way I'm paying $6.99 for something anyone with a few functional brain cells can do. Someone with a whole lot of functional brain cells and a penchant for getting crafty can really improve on this concept. See what I mean:

Now that's a pumpkin pie!

Seriously, when I get this crafty, I kind of make myself sick. And with pepperoni of all things....

I have to admit that I'm rather impressed my improvised pita stem browned nicely in the oven to look even more like a stem. I didn't expect the cheese to run everywhere since it's low-fat cheese and typically doesn't do that, but I was nevertheless pleased that Pumpkin Face didn't come out looking like Pizza the Hut: