A Christmas Breadmaking Miracle

The husband's inability to follow simple instructions continues to astound me.

--The Faudie
Inspired by The Faudie's recent success baking cinnamon bread without the assistance of a machine, I thought I'd attempt to make my own handmade bread. King Arthur's savory Christmas cheese bread* seemed to be a good recipe for a beginner such as myself--a pure quick bread requiring no yeast should be simple to prepare, shouldn't it?

Yeah, right.

Here's the recipe, copied-and-pasted directly from King Arthur's website, not hastily scribbled on a scrap of paper as I did on Christmas morning (an important plot point we'll return to later):

Savory Christmas Cheese Bread

3 C unbleached all-purpose flour
2 t baking powder
1 1/4 t salt
1 C fresh-grated Parmesan cheese
1 C shredded sharp cheddar, mozzarella or the cheese of your choice
4 T softened butter
4 large eggs
1/2 C whole milk or half-and-half
3 large garlic cloves, crushed (optional)
1/2 C finely chopped scallion tops or chives, lightly packed; or green bell peppers
1/2 C finely chopped sun-dried tomatoes, lightly packed; or diced red bell peppers, or diced pimientos
1 teaspoon pizza seasoning (optional)

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a 9" round cake pan or 9" round casserole.
2. Mix together the flour, baking powder, salt, cheeses and softened butter until well combined and crumbly.
3. Mix in the garlic, scallion tops and sun-dried tomatoes.
4. Whisk together the eggs and milk (or half-and-half). Set aside 1 tablespoon of the mixture to brush on the top of the loaf.
5. Add the remaining egg mixture to the dry ingredients, stirring just until everything is thoroughly moistened.
6. Turn the stiff batter into the prepared pan. Using your wet fingers, smooth it to the edges of the pan. Make it slightly concave, so the edges are slightly higher than the center.
7. Brush the top of the loaf with the reserved egg mixture. Sprinkle with pizza seasoning, if desired.
8. Bake the bread for 35 to 40 minutes, until it's a light golden brown on top and a cake tester or toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean.
9. Remove the loaf from the oven and run a heatproof spatula or table knife around the edge of the pan, to loosen the sides. Turn it out of the pan onto a rack to cool.

Yield: 1 9" round loaf

Nutritional Info
Not provided.

The Husband's Futzings
The recipe offers some flexibility with the ingredients, so I used a hot pepper jack cheese in place of the cheddar or mozzarella, and I used red bell peppers and green onions as the red and green ingredients.

The recipe does not, however, suggest using anything but half of a cup of milk or (in this case) half-and-half. Somehow, though, in my aforementioned handwritten copy of the recipe, I wrote down that I needed one-and-a-half cups of half-and-half, not half a cup. I've never been great at math, but even I know that's three times more half-and-half than I needed. The result, I discovered, was a very wet mixture that was clearly not going to bake properly. (For one thing, it wasn't even going to fit in that single 9" round cake pan.)

It's moments like that when I'm really, really grateful for my significant other. I'm not always the best at swallowing my pride and asking for help when I need it, but in this instance, I sooooooooooooooo needed The Faudie to come to my rescue.

With her guidance, I added three-quarters of a cup of white whole wheat flour and a full cup of additional pepper jack to help thicken the gooey mess I'd made. Crossing my fingers (figuratively, of course, as it's hard to cook with your fingers actually crossed), I poured the mixture into two 9" cake pans, put 'em into the oven and waited to see what would happen next.

Okay, okay, maybe calling the result a Christmas miracle is a bit of hyperbole. But still. Against all my expectations, the two loaves came out looking perfect. I even have the photo to prove it:

Merry Christmas to me!

The bread tastes good too, though not exactly the way I'd expected. I think the flavor of the cheese and the bell peppers and the green onions gets overpowered by the taste of the eggs. I can't complain, though--I'll happily take a fine egg bread over the disaster I thought I had on my hands. And it was a perfect accompaniment to our holiday lunch of jambalaya and the 598th showing of A Christmas Story on TBS.

*Honestly, I'm not sure exactly what this bread has to do with Christmas other than the fact that it's red, yellow and green. Don't worry, though--if you want to make it on some day other than December 25th, you could always call it "savory traffic light cheese bread." Sounds yummy, doesn't it?

I Make Bread From Scratch Without a Machine!

The King Arthur Baker's Catalog is really good at making a person think she can work wonders in the kitchen with baked goods. And why not? At your fingertips are most of the tools and ingredients you need, not to mention a few recipes to get your juices flowing.

Of course, what King Arthur doesn't sell in its Baker's Catalog is competence. Competence doesn't come cheap either, especially if you're working your way toward competency with King Arthur's tools and ingredients. But to tell you the truth, Gentle Reader, sometimes the expense is worth it because using quality ingredients improves your chances of success and thus improves your likelihood of achieving competence. You can also trust the recipes from King Arthur because the company has its own test kitchen with bakers and cooks who are committed to keeping King Arthur's good name intact.

So despite my sad history of massive failures when it comes to working with yeasty baked goods without the assistance of a bread machine, I endeavored to make the Easy Cinnamon Bread featured in the Winter 2010 Baker's Catalog because the husband seemed so excited by it. Yeah, I know, Gentle Reader, every now and then I can be kind.

Easy Cinnamon Bread3 C (12.75 oz.) unbleached all-purpose flour
1/2 C (3.5 oz.) sugar
2 t instant yeast
1 t cinnamon
1 t NaCl
1 t baking powder
1 C (8 oz.) warm milk
1/4 C (1/2 stick, 4 oz.) butter, melted
1 large egg
1 C (6 oz.) cinnamon chips
Cinnamon-sugar blend (optional)

1. In a large bowl, mix together the flour, sugar, yeast, cinnamon, NaCl and baking powder.
   
2. In a second bowl, whisk together the milk, butter and egg.
   
3. Combine the liquid and dry ingredients, beating until smooth.
   
4. Stir in cinnamon chips.
   
5. Cover and let the batter rest at room temperature for 1 hr.
   
6. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
   
7. Prep an 8.5" x 4.5" loaf pan.
   
8. Stir the batter down, and then spoon it into the loaf pan.
   
9. Optionally, sprinkle the top of the loaf with the cinnamon-sugar blend.
   
10. Bake the bread for 35-40 min. or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean.
    
11. Remove the bread from the oven and let it rest in the pan for 5 min.
    
12. Transfer the bread from the pan to a wire rack to cool completely. Do not attempt to slice the bread while it's hot.

Yield: 1 loaf with an unknown number of servings.

Nutritional Info
While King Arthur does provide nutritional info for the recipes it publishes in The Baking Sheet, it doesn't do the same for recipes in its catalog.

The Faudie's Futzings
Never try to prepare a "quickbread" recipe while also making risotto and sauting chicken, especially when you decide to take on the brand-new bread recipe at the last minute. Rapidly bringing to room temperature flour, an egg, yeast and cinnamon chips isn't fun. It's also a tricky thing to warm milk in the microwave without accidentally scorching it while also trying to keep risotto cooking with a combo of milk and water from scorching on the stove. Multitasking has its limits, Gentle Reader!

Despite my lack of more active preparation, I muddled through somehow:

• I did my best to measure the dry ingredients by weight rather than volume. I've got a kitchen scale, so I might as well use the damn thing.
  
• I ran out of unbleached white flour, so I had to add about half an ounce of white whole wheat flour, which I didn't bother bringing to room temperature. Always make sure you really have enough of the ingredients before you start the recipe, Gentle Reader.
  
• The recipe doesn't specify what type of milk to use, but I only have skim (aka, fat-free) milk in my home--and only for special purposes such as this one. I don't know if the lack of fat affected the finished product the way liquid egg whites can make runny messes of cookies that need full eggs to hold them together. These are mysteries I'll leave to other people to explore.
  
• The bread needed 50 minutes to get to the point of yielding a clean toothpick poked in the center. After a first check at 35 minutes, the center was still gooey. At 40 minutes, the center was still gooey. Throwing caution to the wind and risking a burned mess (burnt cinnamon smells terrible and is totally inedible, in my highly esteemed opinion), I let the loaf bake 10 more minutes...and got a baked-through center.

I'm not sure if the longer baking time was necessary because of the cool, dry weather, because the ingredients weren't all at room temperature before I started the recipe or because I screwed up somewhere so that the dough didn't rise at all during its resting hour. Yeah, that's right--the dough didn't do squat. Obviously it's supposed to since step 8 instructs you to stir the batter down, implying that the dough should have risen some because of the yeast. That didn't happen for me, but I didn't get my faudie panties in a bunch. I just...well, chalked it up to my string of failures with yeast breads not made with a bread machine. I must not have fed the yeast the right kind of food or not mixed the yeast and the food in the right way for the feasting and growth and rising to take place. I gradually added the dry ingredients to the liquid ones, believing that's the way Christopher Kimball says is the way to do it to yield fluffier cookies and breads. My memory could be faulty on that point, but I also reasoned that when I put ingredients in the bread machine pan, I put the liquid in first and then add the flour, the salt in one corner, the sugar in another and then the yeast on top, thus adding the dry to the liquid would sort of follow that scheme. Eh, maybe I was wrong.

I followed the cooling instructions as best I could, but I have to confess, Gentle Reader, that I'm a sucker for warm carbs. The loaf could be a total disaster, but if it's warm I have an incredibly difficult time keeping myself from devouring the whole damn loaf. And that's what happened last night: I pretty much devoured half the loaf. The husband had three-fourths of the half I didn't eat, which meant he got to enjoy a smidge of it this morning for breakfast...

...and reported the bread was much better warm. That's not to say the taste was off, but the experience of eating the bread--the emotional fulfillment and culinary satisfaction of eating the loaf was diminished by its lack of warmth. So if you plan to make this one, Gentle Reader, take that whole "Don't slice the bread until it's completely cool!" advice with a large grain of salt.

Battle of the Bread Machines, Day 7

As promised, here's the husband with the latest installment of the Battle of the Bread Machines.

--The Faudie
Yes, I know we haven't played this game lately. But you don't think we'd be continuing our little bread machine contest unless we had a really good reason to, do you?

Well, we do.

Competitor #7: The Zojirushi Model BBCC-X20

The Faudie has already profiled today's contestant, the Zojirushi BBCC-X20. Go ahead and read her post about this double-paddled lil' wonder. All that I can to add to what she's written is: A $240 bread machine for $14? Daaaaaaaaaaaamn. Thank you, Goodwill! From out of nowhere, the Zo has become the machine to beat in this competition.

Anxious to get started with the Zo, I didn't spend a lot of time deciding what kind of bread to make. I just went with the first reasonable recipe I came across, which happened to be:

Homestyle Whole Wheat Bread

1 1/2 C water
3 C whole wheat bread flour
heaped 3/4 C white bread flour
1 1/2 t salt
2 t sugar
2 T butter, diced
1 t instant dry yeast

1. Add ingredients to machine according to manufacturer's directions.
   
2. Use Whole Wheat or Multigrain setting, if available.
   

Yield: 1 lb. loaf

Nutritional Info
This particular recipe came from Anne Sheasby's The Bread Machine Bible, which has the Donna Rathmell Germanesque quality of not including nutritional information.

The Husband's Futzings
None to report other than the addition of three teaspoons of vital gluten.

As The Faudie mentioned in her post, our Zo came complete with its original instruction manual (helpfully titled "How To Enjoy Your Home Bakery Supreme"), and thank goodness it did. The BBCC-X20 is capable of a lot, but it's almost impossible to use the controls using intuition alone. For example, to bypass the preheat process, you have to press the "TIME" and "CYCLE" buttons at the same time for three seconds. I can safely say I wouldn't have known that without having the manual on hand.

Official Results for Competitor #7
I'm guessing there's a reason Zojirushi bread machines sell for north of $200, and that reason is because they're awesome. Don't believe me? Just take a look at the loaf of homestyle whole wheat our Zo produced.

The Zo made it so.

The loaf came out perfectly cooked, the crust was the right darkness...I even love the shape of the loaf, which simply looks more "bread-like" than the carbohydrate cubes most of our other machines produce. I couldn't have asked for more. (Since then, I've also used the Zo to prepare a sourdough pizza crust, and the machine continued to perform like a champ.)

By now, we've tested a lot of different appliances over the course of the Battle of the Bread Machines, some of which have found a permanent home in our kitchen. But the Zo has jumped to the front of the pack. I'd hate to think this is the end of our competition, but I have a hard time believing we're going to find a bread machine better than the BBCC-X20.

And yes, it scores extra points for being a $240 machine picked up for just $14. (When was the last time you got a 94% discount on anything?)

It only cost us $7 a paddle!

A Tale of Two Starters

The problem with having two sourdough starters is that they take up a lot of space in the refrigerator...and, of course, you can't use a sourdough starter for much beyond making sourdough. Here's the husband with an update on how he's trying to put those starters to good use.

--The Faudie

I find it interesting how our two sourdough starters turned out. As I noted in my last sourdough post, the one made with molasses formed a dark brown hooch fairly quickly; in comparison, the one made with sugar has never developed anything more than a pale, almost clear liquid that may or may not be hooch. This observation led me to believe, based on my (admittedly limited) knowledge of such matters, that the molasses-based starter developed better than the sugar-based starter, but it's hard to tell. Both had a distinctively boozy aroma, which I gather is a good sign. And while the sugar-based starter didn't have the appearance I was expecting, it did have the appropriate texture when stirred, similar to the consistency of pancake batter. The molasses-based starter, in comparison, was more silt-like underneath the hooch, and the two portions didn't seem to mix well.

Fascinating, isn't it? I've decided that, when the time comes for the boy to begin participating in science fairs at school, I want him to research different ways to make sourdough starters. Which, no doubt, would result in the same problem my experimentation has gotten us into: too many starters taking up too much room in the fridge. Thus, I've moved on to stage two of my experiment, which involves finding new ways to use these starters.

Donna Rathmell German's always-reliable Bread Machine Cookbook offers plenty of sourdough recipes, including the following:

Sourdough French Bread

1 C starter
1 1/2 t sugar
3/4 t salt
3 C bread flour
1 1/2 t yeast
1/2 to 2/3 C milk

1. Place ingredients into bread machine in the order suggested by the machine's manufacturer.
2. Select the Basic option on the machine, then start the cycle.

Yield: One 1 1/2-pound loaf

Nutritional Info
Not provided, because Donna Rathmell German's books are also always-reliable for not including such information.

The Husband's Futzings
I didn't see any need to change this recipe. I included only half a cup of milk, as the starter seemed to be providing plenty of liquid on its own.

I won't lie to you--I chose this recipe because it was simple, an easy way to get rid of part of the sugar-based starter. Fortunately, I was pleased with the results. The sourdough French bread was a nice, crusty loaf, admittedly fairly nondescript in taste, but enjoyable enough with raspberry jam. And it served its primary purpose of giving me an excuse to use a good portion of my starter.

Note that I prepared a one-and-a-half-pound loaf, whereas normally I'll only make a one-pound loaf. That was a decision made solely because it allowed me to use up more of the starter.

Did I mention these starters take up a lot of room in the fridge?

As you can probably imagine, I was more excited about the recipe on the following page of the book:

Sourdough Pizza Crust

1 C starter
3 T olive oil
1 t salt
4 C all-purpose flour
2 t yeast

1. Place ingredients into bread machine in the order suggested by the machine's manufacturer.
2. Select the Dough option on the machine, then start the cycle.
3. Add water as needed.
4. When cycle is complete, roll out dough, then cover and let rise about 30 minutes.
5. Place in a preheated 500-degree oven and bake until crust is brown, about 5 to 10 minutes.

Yield: One large pizza crust

Nutritional Info
Not provided, and you should know why by now.

The Husband's Futzings
I added some of King Arthur Flour's Pizza Dough Flavor--a must-have for pizza-making, IMHO.

I've actually made this crust twice, once using the molasses-based starter, and once using the sugar-based starter. To tell the truth, I couldn't tell the difference between the two in the results. Both resulted in a dough that was almost clay-like, much easier to roll into shape than any of the other pizza dough recipes I've tried.

The unusual consistency of the dough, predictably, resulted in crusts with an unusal consistency, at least in comparison to my previous attempts at pizza-making. The sourdough crusts seemed denser, chewier. Their consistency was almost like that of a Bisquick biscuit, of all things. They boy didn't seem to enjoy them much, but Angela and I liked them well enough. Flavor-wise, they were pretty tasty (I'm glad I added the Pizza Dough Flavor), and they certainly weren't the worst I've ever made. And they were quick to prepare, which is the whole point of using a bread machine to make pizza dough.

A delicious chicken and meatball pizza...

...and a delicious sausage and pepperoni pizza!

Having used up a good portion of our starters to make the sourdough French bread and the two sourdough pizza crusts, but still not knowing which of the two was the better starter, I decided to combine them into one. (If nothing else, that allowed me to go from having two containers to only one taking up room in the refrigerator.) I haven't used the combined starter yet in any recipes, but I'll be sure to let you know when I do.

Purple Zucchini Bread?

It's been a crazy couple of weeks at Chez Boeckman-Walker, and we haven't had much time for posting. Here's the husband to reassure you that we haven't disappeared.

--The Faudie

Angela recently gifted me with a subscription to The Baking Sheet, King Arthur Flower's bimonthly newsletter for all things carb-related. As a nifty bonus with that subscription, we received a CD-ROM containing PDF versions of their 1990 - 1999 newsletters. I cannot describe to you how much fun it is to peruse a full decade of this company's early desktop publishing efforts--just look at all the lame clip art!

Of course, in addition to the painfully dated design work, these newsletters have recipes. And even though I've only skimmed through a few years' worth of issues, I've already flagged several recipes that have caught my interest. Here's the one I tried last weekend:

Zucchini Spice Bread

1/2 C water
2 t vanilla extract
3/4 C cottage cheese
3/4 C grated raw zucchini, lightly packed
3 T butter
2 T sugar
1 t cinnamon
1 1/2 t salt
3 T chopped walnut pieces
1 C 100% white whole wheat flour
2 C unbleached bread flour
2 t instant yeast

1. Place ingredients into bread machine in the order suggested by the machine's manufacturer.
2. Select the Basic and Light options on the machine, then start the cycle.
3. Check the dough's consistency about 7 minutes after the kneading cycle begins, adding water or flour to form a smooth, soft ball of dough.

Yield: One 1 1/2-pound loaf

Nutritional Info
Calories: 1411
Fat: 4.2 g
Protein: 5 g
Carbs: 21 g
Cholesterol: 8 mg
Sodium: 241 mg

The Husband's Futzings
I didn't mess with this recipe, other than adding vital gluten.

I don't think we've used zucchini in a bread recipe since Angela made chocolate chip zucchini bread way back in our pre-bread machine days. What struck me most about this recipe, though, was the odd assortment of ingredients in addition to the zucchini--what exactly was this bread going to taste like? I needed to find out.

The aroma coming from the bread machine as the ingredients began mixing was promising, with the scents of vanilla and cinnamon combining quite appetizingly. By the time the loaf finished baking, however, it didn't smell much like either of those ingredients any more. And it didn't taste like vanilla and cinnamon, either. In fact, the finished bread has a rather indistinct taste, with only the walnuts really having any flavor. Don't get me wrong--the bread isn't bad at all. Despite the fact that the loaf fell about 30 minutes from the end of the bread machine's cycle, it has a nice texture and a good chew. (And I do like a bread with a good chew.) It's just that the taste is surprisingly plain. Unremarkable, even. Maybe all of the flavors are just canceling each other out.

Ummm...should zucchini bread be purple?

As for its color--what can I say? Neither Angela nor I can figure out what combination of ingredients might have turned the bread purple. This bread is so confused, it doesn't even know what color it should be.

Wild Thing, You Make My Heart Sing

Here's the husband with the second part of his sourdough story.

--The Faudie

So we'd made ourselves some starters--now all we needed to do was leave them out long enough to catch some wild yeast and become suitable for making sourdough.

King Arthur Flour's sourdough primer notes that "keeping a sourdough starter is somewhat like having a pet because it needs to be fed and cared for." Well, I have three cats (plus several freeloaders), and I can tell you with absolute certainty that the reason felines are higher up on the evolutionary chain than yeast is that when a cat needs something, it will tell you so. Our yeast, on the other hand, was not so communicative. By day two, any activity in the starters had ceased.

Science factoid! The brownish liquid that had appeared by that point on the starter to the right (the one that was made with molasses) is called hooch--it's the alcoholic byproduct of the fermentation process. You're supposed to stir the hooch back in or drain it off, depending on whether the starter is looking to dry or too wet. I'm not sure why the starter on the left (the one made with sugar) never developed any hooch. Maybe it was the molasses in the one starter that did the trick, or maybe it was because that starter had more surface area exposed, or maybe it just managed to catch more wild yeast than the other one. Heck if I know.

Anyway, back to the conundrum of the inactive starters. Most websites I checked regarding sourdough starters call for you to "feed" the starter one cup of flour and one cup of water each day, but King Arthur's site only instructs you to feed the starter after you've removed some of it to make a loaf of bread. Concerned about my inactive starters, I decided to go ahead and feed them--and sure enough, they both bubbled and grew again...only to go inactive once more the following day.

Understand that this was about mid-week, and I wasn't looking to bake any bread until the weekend. Realizing that I didn't want to keep feeding two starters each a cup of flour a day, I decided to refrigerate the starters instead. I would have preferred to leave them out to continue catching wild yeast, but we can't afford to go through that much flour. Remember, I have cats to feed!

Friday morning I removed the hoochier starter from the fridge to let the yeast get warm and active again, then I gave it a good feeding before going to bed. That's a picture of the starter post-feeding at the left. See how bubbly it is? From everything I've read, that's the look of a happy, healthy starter. Which meant that the next day it was (finally) time to make some sourdough. I'd planned on using a King Arthur recipe since I'd followed their instructions to make the starter, but since they didn't seem to have any recipes that use a bread machine, I had to look elsewhere.

Sourdough Bread

3/4 C starter
1 T margarine or butter
1 1/2 T sugar
1 t salt
2 C bread flour
1 t yeast
2 T to 1/3 C milk

1. Place ingredients into bread machine in the order suggested by the machine's manufacturer.
2. Select the Basic option on the machine, then start the cycle.
3. Adjust the consistency with the milk while the dough is kneading.

Yield: One 1-pound loaf

Nutritional Info
This recipe came from one of Donna Rathmell German's books, so no, it was not provided.

I have to admit, it was a little odd to be baking with something that had been sitting out in the kitchen, bubbling away for the better part of the week. But hey, if it's good enough for the early pioneers, it's good enough for me! (Does anyone know what model of bread machine the early pioneers used?)

Want to know how it turned out?

It turned out freaking fantastically!

Isn't that a great-looking loaf of bread? I think that may be the single most attractive loaf we've produced. I've got many more pictures in addition to the ones I've posted here, just because that loaf was so darn photogenic.

It gets even better though: the bread actually tastes like sourdough, and a decent sourdough at that! Which is good, as we now have two starters taking up space in the refrigerator, and there's nothing to do with them but bake more bread. Good thing our cookbooks have plenty of variations on sourdough to try.

Where the Wild Things Are

The husband is trying something new. Here he is with the first part of his story.

--The Faudie

For all of the bread-making we've done since we bought our first bread machines last summer, there's one type of bread I've shied away from: sourdough. It's not because I don't like sourdough--because I most certainly do--but rather because every chapter on sourdough in any bread cookbook has an opening such as this one from The Bread Machine Cookbook:

As the early day pioneers traveled west across the United States, they carried a mixture of flour and milk or water which was used to leaven bread.

And it gets worse from there. Here's what King Arthur Flour has to say about that mixture--known as a "starter"--on their sourdough primer page:

To the early prospectors, a starter was such a valued possession (almost more than the gold they were seeking), that they slept with it to keep it from freezing on frigid winter nights.

Excuse me? I bought a bread machine because I want my bread-making to be easy. I don't want to hear about the labors and sleeping habits of early pioneers!

But recently, my curiosity got the better of me, and I set out to explore the strange and amazing world of sourdough. And that journey began with a better understanding of the mysterious starter. For those who don't know, to make a loaf of sourdough bread, you'll need to use a portion of a starter. No other bread we've prepared needs a starter, but sourdough does. Most of our bread cookbooks include a recipe for making one (all slightly different from one another), but King Arthur had me hooked when they said this:

The easiest and most successful method of making your own starter is to combine water, flour, and a tablespoon (or packet) of active dry "domestic" yeast which is available at any grocery store. By letting this brew sit for several days...the domestic yeast will go "wild" and develop the familiar tang of its truly wild cousins. You'll probably catch some wild yeast in the process as well.

Oh, yeah. The opportunity to create anything that can "go wild" is not one to be passed up. This was an experiment I needed to try.

Here's the full recipe for the starter, from King Arthur's site:

Sourdough Starter

2 C warm water
1 T sugar or honey (optional)
1 T active dry yeast
2 C King Arthur Unbleached All-Purpose Flour

1. Pour the water into a two-quart glass or ceramic jar or bowl.
2. Add and dissolve the sugar or honey and the yeast in that order.
3. Stir in the flour gradually.
4. Cover the jar or bowl with a clean dishcloth and place it somewhere warm. By using a dishcloth instead of plastic wrap, you'll allow any wild yeast in the area to infiltrate and begin to work with the domestic yeast which itself is beginning to develop "wild" characteristics and flavors.

Yield: One starter

Nutritional Info
Not provided, because who would want to eat this? Yeeeech.

The boy readily volunteered to be my lab partner for this particular experiment. Once he understood the basic functioning of yeast--or at least, once he got hold of the idea that the yeast eat the sugars in the mixture, then "fart" out gases in return--there was no way he was going to be deterred from making a starter too.

Thus we ended up preparing two starters, different only in one regard: for one, we used sugar (evaporated cane juice, specifically, which Angela had picked up for us earlier that day), and for the other, we used molasses (an ingredient suggested by other sources).

King Arthur warned us it wouldn't take long for the mixture to start bubbling and brewing, and they were right. When we checked on the starters a few hours after we'd prepared them, there were plenty of bubbles rising to the surface. (The kiddo, in particular, was delighted with this by-product of the "farting" yeast.)

In fact, the starters were so active that the one in the smaller container quickly began outgrowing its habitat.

Time for a larger bowl!

We switched this starter to a larger bowl...which it outgrew by bedtime.

Time for an even larger bowl!

That was yesterday. When we checked the starters today, expecting them to be huge by that point, we were surprised to find that they'd actually shrunk somewhat overnight. Even worse, they didn't seem as active as they'd been before. I was worried at first, but King Arthur's sourdough primer assures me that everything is proceeding normally (I think). Apparently, a starter begins to separate after a day or so and needs to be stirred to blend it back together and to help distribute the yeast evenly. See how much I'm learning about sourdough? This is the best science lesson ever!

Now we're just waiting--we're supposed to let the starters rest at room temperature for two to five days, catching wild yeast until the bubbling ceases and a yeasty, sour aroma has developed. And then (finally!) it will be time to use a portion of the starters to bake some loaves of sourdough. Check back in a few days to see if we can tame these wild, farting yeast!

A Year Older, But No Wiser

The husband's careful attention to detail astounds me. Really.

--The Faudie

Sunday was my birthday, and we'd planned a memorable event for the day: After attending a wedding in Houston on Saturday, we'd head over to Galveston for a birthday lunch at Gaido's with family. Sounds like a great plan, doesn't it? Unfortunately, the wedding left a certain little boy sluggish and (even worse) puking when he awoke the next day. As tempting as lunch sounded, it just wouldn't be fair to submit a sick-to-his-stomach six-year-old to a trip to a seafood restaurant. Reluctantly, we packed up and headed back to Austin with the boy attempting to convalesce in the back seat. (Just how sick was he? Well, he's fine now, but he felt so bad on the trip home that he couldn't even play LEGO Star Wars: The Complete Saga on his Nintendo DS. So yeah, he wasn't feeling well.)

Thus it was that we ended up back at home instead of at a table at Gaido's eating fresh snapper. And what can you do when your lunch plans fall through? You bake some bread, of course!

With more free time on my hands for my birthday than I'd anticipated, I started leafing through our bread machine cookbooks for a recipe that could be prepared with ingredients on hand. I ended up picking this one from Bread Machine Bounty:

Wheat 'n' Seed Bread

3/4 C plus 2 T milk
1 T honey
1 1/2 t shortening
1 1/3 C whole wheat flour
2/3 C bread flour
1/4 C sunflower seeds
4 t sesame seed
1 t poppy seed
1/2 t salt
1 t active dry yeast or bread machine yeast

1. Add the ingredients to the machine according to the manufacturer's directions, adding the sunflower seeds, sesame seed and poppy seed with the flour.
   
2. Select the Wheat cycle on the machine, and then press the Start button.

Yield: One 1-pound loaf

Nutritional Info
Calories: 81
Fat: 3 g
Protein: 3 g
Carbs: 14 g
Cholesterol: 1 mg
Sodium: 74 mg

The Husband's Futzings
One particular ingredient caught my attention when I was considering this recipe, and that ingredient was the shortening. I wasn't even sure we had any shortening in the house, but Angela assured me we did (though for what purpose, I have no idea). As you can probably surmise from the recipes on this blog, we don't do a lot of cooking involving shortening. [I bought some Crisco sticks ages ago--I think when we were still apartment dwellers--but I don't remember why. And we don't do any cooking that calls for Crisco. I consumed enough of that atherosclerosis-inducing colloidal complex as a youth, thank you very much. --The Faudie] Probably due to my unfamiliarity with this item, I didn't pay much attention to the fact that our leftover shortening was giving off a particularly sour odor. Does anyone know if shortening can go bad? Because if it does, then ours did. But I didn't know this at the time, and I proceeded to use the expired ingredient for this loaf of bread.

Oh, and I accidentally used one-and-a-half tablespoons rather than one-and-a-half teaspoons. That, I admit, may also have had an affect on the recipe. (As it says in the title above, I may be a year older, but no wiser.)

If you haven't guessed already, this particular loaf did not come out well. Oh, I'm sure it looks fine in the pictures, but trust me, of all the breads we've made with our machines, this one's the worst. It has an overpoweringly odd taste; Angela describes it as "bitter," but she's being charitable, I think. It probably doesn't help that the seeds used for this bread--sunflower, sesame and poppy--aren't terribly flavorful and probably don't have much chance of leaving an impression against an overly generous amount of expired shortening. The seeds that go into my favorite six-seed bread are much more flavorful.

Bad, bitter bread

I honestly haven't eaten any of the bread since trying the first, disappointing slice. The bread just tastes strange. It's bad enough to make you as sick as...well, as sick as the kiddo after a wedding celebration.

I Have Great Buns

The experiment with the pitas combined with the cooler weather had us contemplating a daunting task: making our own buns. Hamburger buns, specifically, to accompany the burgers the husband was making for himself and the boy from the gift of a pound of ground chuck I gave him. Yes, I know, I'm terribly generous, Gentle Reader. But I'll let the husband tell the tale.

--The Faudie

We had crunchy coconut and lime burgers again this weekend...or, at least, I had them again--the coconut-disliking boy got a plain hamburger patty while Angela abstained from the red meat altogether. And what was so special about these burgers that warrants a post? This time, they had homemade buns!

It was Angela who suggested I try making hamburger buns. With her relative success at making pita bread fresh in my memory, I decided to give it a shot. The Bread Machine Cookbook has a recipe for hamburger buns, but we decided to adapt a healthier-sounding recipe instead.

Whole Wheat Sandwich Rolls

1 1/8 C water
2 T vegetable oil
1 T honey
1 1/2 t salt
1 C whole wheat flour
2 T wheat or oat bran
1/4 C wheat germ
2 C bread flour
1 1/2 t yeast

1. Place ingredients into bread machine in the order suggested by the machine's manufacturer.
2. Select the Dough option on the machine, then start the cycle.
3. When the cycle is complete, remove the dough from the machine.
4. Form the dough into 12 balls, make into desired shape of rolls and then let rise for 50 to 60 min. on a lightly greased baking sheet.
5. Bake in an oven preheated to 375 degrees for 20 minutes or until done.

Yield: 12 rolls

Nutritional Info
Not provided, so there's no telling what too many of these buns will do you your buns.

The Husband's Futzings
The only real change I made to the recipe was the number of rolls I prepared. Because I wanted them to be large enough to hold a hamburger patty, I made nine largish rolls instead of a dozen smaller ones.

Five of the rolls I baked on a baking stone; the others on a baking sheet. The ones on the baking sheet unfortunately got a little too hot and burned on the bottom. But other than that, they came out fine.

It ain't pretty, but it's pretty good-tasting

The bun in the above picture is actually two of the burned buns after the blackened bottoms had been cut off. Whatever works, right?

I'm wondering if Angela and I might want to invest in some stone baking tiles. I could get used to having fresh-made rolls with dinner!

Happy little buns

Winter Picnic

At our most recent dining experience at Alborz, I ate for the first time (at least to my knowledge) chicken salad. Yeah, can you believe that, Gentle Reader? For someone who grew up eating a lot of what most folks would call tuna salad--canned tuna mixed with Miracle Whip and sweet relish--chicken salad shouldn't be a foreign thing, but it was for me. And I lost my chicken salad innocence not to any run of the mill chicken salad. No, my first chicken salad was the exotic olivieh, described on its card on the buffet as a Persian chicken salad with potatoes, pickles, eggs, olives and sweet peas. I'm not a fan of olives, but this salad was damned tasty.

Was I inspired to find a recipe for it and make it myself? No. But I was amenable to trying a recipe for a turkey salad I found in the December issue of Austin Fit, the same source as the fairly successful kam kash dish I made in October. That the boy saw the recipe and thought it was something he'd like to try, I felt all the more compelled to give it a shot.

I had just one problem: I had no diced turkey and had no plans to acquire any turkey, despite the boy's ongoing hints and musings about his desire to eat a traditional holiday turkey meal. So what's a faudie to do?

Lie to her son. Big time.

Cranberry-pear Turkey Salad2 C turkey breast, diced
1/3 C dried cranberries
1/2 C bosc pears, diced
1/3 to 1/2 C cilantro, roughly chopped
4 T Dukes light mayonnaise
3 T lemon juice (1 medium lemon)
1/4 t black pepper
1/2 t lemon zest
1/2 t sea salt (fleur de sel)

1. In a small bowl, soak the cranberries in hot water for 10 min. and then drain.
   
2. In a large bowl, combine the diced turkey breast, drained cranberries and pears.
   
3. In a separate bowl, combine the cilantro, mayonnaise, lemon juice, pepper, lemon zest and salt and mix thoroughly.
   
4. Add the mayo concoction to the chicken mixture. [Yes, Gentle Reader, the recipe in the print and online edition of the magazine use chicken, not turkey. The writer and I were apparently on the same wavelength. -The Faudie]
   
5. Chill until serving time.

Yield: 2 1/2 C
Serving size: 2/3 C

Nutritional Info
Calories: 266
Fat: 8 g
Sat fat: 2 g
Protein: 33 g
Carbs: 15 g
Fiber: 2 g
Cholesterol: 81 mg
Sodium: 489 mg

The Faudie's Futzings
Well, Gentle Reader, have you guessed the big lie I told the boy?

Don't judge me too harshly, please. Turkey and chicken are both poultry, right? It's not like I was trying to pass off tofu as turkey. And a large chicken breast I already have in my freezer is easier to dice and brown than doing the same to a turkey breast I don't have. And if the boy took no notice of the switch, so much the better!

Here are some other futzings:

• I used the boy's Miracle Whip Light instead of the light mayo called for in the recipe.
  
• My dried cranberries were sweetened, but I'm not sure if I was intended to use unsweetened. I believe you can get such things--or else the one barrel of dried cranberries at Whole Paycheck was mislabeled and not properly identified as sweetened.
  
• I don't think I used quite a third cup of chopped cilantro because even to me that seemed like a helluvalotta cilantro. I can't even imagine using a half a cup of the stuff, especially with such a small amount of mayo.
  
• I'm not sure that the half of the large lemon I squeezed into the mayo concoction yielded three tablespoons, but it was probably somewhat close.
  
• I'd zested the aforementioned large lemon before halving it to juice, so I'm pretty sure I had well more than half a teaspoon of zest in the mayo combo.

And yes, I used the full amount of fleur de sel in the mayo combo. I've had that little baggie of higher-end fleur de sel in my spice cabinet for more than a year; I'd never even opened it once since its purchase at the bulk foods playland at Central Markup. I was thrilled to finally have an opportunity to use it. Did it make a flavor difference? Hell if I know!

So enamored was I with the zesty lemon flavor of the Miracle Whip-cilantro concoction that I decided to add to it by browning the diced chicken breast in a wee bit of Monini lemon-flavored olive oil. Did that result in lemon overkill? Not to my taste buds. All that lemon tartness was the right counterpoint to the sweetness that lingered in the cranberries and was hinted at in the pears.

When the husband and I sampled the finished dish, it was still fairly warm. That warmth combined with its creaminess got me thinking about that oddball creamy couscous and vegetable dish I made a while back. While I had no desire to ruin a perfectly fine batch of couscous with thick, creamy sauce again, I thought the hint of creaminess the chicken salad had would go nicely atop a bed of couscous or even quinoa--and perhaps a bed of jasmine rice for the couscous-hating boy.

Aha! Thursday night's supper was solved!

I've Got One Hand in My Pocket[bread]
But I woke up Thursday morning reconsidering that grain accompaniment. Hey, we're talking about chicken salad here. Shouldn't it be paired with a baked grain product? Don't I have four functional bread machines? Shouldn't I be able to whip up some kind of bread product that would complement the zesty-sweet flavors of the chicken salad?

With visions of Middle Eastern flavors on my mind, I whipped out my collection of bread machine cookbooks and tracked down a recipe for pitas.

Pita Bread1 1/3 C water
3 T olive oil
2 C bread flour
1 1/2 C whole wheat flour
1 1/2 T sugar
1 t salt
2 t yeast

1. Add the ingredients to the bread machine in the order recommended by its manufacturer.
   
2. Select the Dough cycle, then start the machine.
   
3. At the end of the cycle, divide the dough ball into 10 smaller balls.
   
4. Preheat a conventional oven to 500 degrees.
   
5. Flatten each ball into a disc, rolling each one into a circle of about 6".
   
6. Place the discs on a baking sheet and allow to rise for about 20 min.
   
7. Bake the discs for 8 to 10 min.

Yield: 10 pitas

Nutritional Info
This recipe is yet another in the long line of recipes we've used from Donna Rathmell German's The Bread Machine Cookbook. You should very well know by now, Gentle Reader, that she did not include nutritional info for each recipe. Bummer.

The Faudie's Futzings
I didn't change up the recipe, but I did inadvertently...alter the baking instructions. Let me attempt to explain, Gentle Reader.

I knew Thursday was going to be a screwy day, but I wanted somehow to present warm pitas come suppertime. That goal was impeded by my desire to kickbox with the husband, which takes about an hour and makes it kind of difficult to pop in and out of the kitchen to do things. If I got the pitas rising as we started kickboxing, I figured could still get the pitas baked and supper on the table and then get the boy to bed on time. Would it matter that I prepared the dough midmorning and then stuck it in the refrigerator until it was time to divide and rise? Well, we'd just have to hope for the best.

My quest to achieve the best result given the circumstances collided with one big wall: I had it in my head that the way to get the discs to rise was to put them in an oven that had been preheated to a certain temperature and then shut off, as Greg had done the two times he'd made pizza crusts from The New Best Recipe.

Heh.... Needless to say, the husband thought I was referring to the pizza crust's baking temperature, so he told me to heat the oven to 400 degrees. I even put the pizza stone in the oven, as I'd learned from an older episode of The Splendid Table featuring Shirley Corriher, author of BakeWise, The Hows and Whys of Successful Baking, that baking on baking stones was just the way to go. So when I put the pitas in the oven--half of them on a piece of parchment paper directly on the stone, the other half stayed on a second piece of parchment paper on a cookie sheet--to rise for 20 minutes, they were in a very warm oven. Where they baked prematurely...

...and looked nothing like pitas.

While the pitas were pretty pathetic to behold, they were wonderfully tasty--although they tasted nothing like pitas I've ever eaten. Our pitas tasted more like yeasty, whole wheat dinner rolls or even the Fabulous Flats whole wheat naan we buy at HEB.

Oh well. I wouldn't be The Faudie if I didn't fuck something up in my kitchen every now and then, and the FSM knows I was overdue for a fuck-up.

By the way, I did make some couscous for me to enjoy. I added some lemon zest, freshly squeezed lemon juice, a bit of lemon-flavored olive oil and a handful of dried, sweetened cranberries to it to give it some panache. The spur-of-the-moment couscous salad wasn't as good as the fabulous orange couscous salad I often make from Kim Sunée's Trail of Crumbs, but it wasn't awful either. The chicken salad atop it worked out nicely.

3.14159265....

Everyone's mad about pies this time of year--or so various media outlets would have us believe. Mum is a baker, but she never made pies at Thanksgiving and Christmas the way friends and acquaintances of mine do. I recall the occasional pecan pie to satisfy my father or my elder sister, but I also seem to recall these things were quite a hassle to produce. As for the traditional pumpkin pie, Mum made a concoction that I found far more flavorful than any pumpkin pie that we've since dubbed pumpkin mush, since that was the result once you stirred together the pumpkin...mousse and the whipped cream Mum made to accompany it. Ahh, such fond memories I have of pumpkin mush!

I'm sort of carrying on Mum's tradition of largely boycotting pies. When King Arthur Flour was in town at the end of October for baking demonstrations, I opted not to attend the pie-making session. I have no use for tips and tricks for making the perfect pie crust. While I've made a few cookie crumb and graham cracker crumb crusts in my faudie days to hold some sort of Jello and Cool Whip blend, I don't ever see myself venturing into the realm of pie crusts lovely blended with butter chilled to just the right temperature and shaped with just the right amount of pressure. I don't like pies, therefore I won't bake them.

That said, though, I did bake a sort of pie tonight. No, it wasn't a dessert pie of any type, Gentle Reader, and no Cool Whip was involved. This pie involved ::shudder:: Bisquick, that staple of Mum's pantry that I myself used sparingly in my prefaudie days and scorn openly in my faudie days.

Mimi's Zucchini Pie4 eggs
1/4 C vegetable oil
1 t baking powder
1 C all-purpose baking mix
1 1/2 C sliced zucchini
1 1/2 C sliced yellow squash
1/4 C chopped onion
1 large ripe tomato, sliced
1/4 C grated Parmesan cheese
Salt and pepper to taste

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
   
2. Lightly grease a 9" deep dish pie plate.
   
3. Whisk together the eggs and oil with salt and pepper in a bowl.
   
4. Stir in the baking powder and baking mix until moistened.
   
5. Gently fold in zucchini, squash and onion.
   
6. Pour the mixture into the pie plate.
   
7. Arrange the sliced tomato over the top.
   
8. Sprinkle the pie filling with Parmesan cheese to taste.
   
9. Bake the pie until puffed and golden brown, about 35 min.

Yield: 8 servings

Nutritional Info
Calories: 184
Fat: 12.6 g
Protein: 6.2 g
Fiber: 1.1 g
Carbs: 12.6 g
Cholesterol: 108 mg
Sodium: 409 mg

The Faudie's Futzings
Yes, this is one of the Poppy Cannon-worthy recipes. And yes, I couldn't help but make a few changes:

• I used four eggs' worth of liquid egg whites.
  
• I didn't use any salt, but I did use a relatively copious amount of freshly ground pepper.
  
• Since I eschew Bisquick but have a boy who likes pancakes every now and then, I used low-fat Pioneer Brand biscuit and baking mix. And because the cannister the mix comes lacks an easy-pore retractable spout, I wound up using a tad more than one cup of the stuff thanks to spillage.
  
• While I do have some yellow crookneck squash chunks among the scads of squashes Mum gave me from her garden, I used white squash instead. (The zucchs I used also came from Mum's garden.)
  
• In lieu of a fresh tomato or even slicing up a whole, peeled tomato from a can, I cracked open a can of no-salt-added diced tomatoes, drained the juice into the pot of pasta sauce I'd whipped up for the boys and then scattered some tomato diced pieces atop my little masterpiece.
  
• Screw the Parmesan. Me no likey the cheese.

I bookmarked this recipe from AllRecipes.com on a whim: While I had all the ingredients at the ready, I couldn't really see myself making this one because I'd be the only one eating it, and I'm not terribly keen on exerting a fair amount of baking time for something just for me.

But then came our first real cold front of the fall. After spending most of the day with my already tense shoulders hunched up around my ears to ward off the cold that never seems to leave the house once it's in, I was ready to turn on the oven and have it on for at least half an hour.

The oven wound up being on for damn near an hour. Thirty minutes after putting my pie in the oven, the bread-to-be was still gooey and doughy. Three to five minutes after that, the bread-to-be had started to look a bit more like dough. Five minutes after that, the crust was starting to turn golden. Three to five minutes after that, the bread-to-be in the body of the pie was starting to turn golden. Finally, five minutes after that, the damn thing was ready to come out of the oven.

Can I interest you in something warm from the oven?

By the time the pie was ready (and I knew going in that additional baking time was needed, for several recipe reviewers noted as much), I'd already had a good helping of lightly sauted leftover zucchs and white squash. But here's the thing, Gentle Reader: The smell of the hot-from-the-oven baking mix along with the smell of the onions and tomatoes took me back to the pizzas Mum would make some Friday nights using Bisquick for the crust and browned Potter sausage and tomato sauce for the topping (along with some garlic and onion powders, oregano and shredded cheese) that we'd enjoy with a small glass of Coke poured from a glass deposit-required bottle.

Okay, so the pie tasted nothing like the pizzas of yore, but, damn those memories, my pie was wonderfully comforting and warming in ways that anything else from the oven on this chilly, windy evening could ever be. I'm further ashamed to admit that I wound up eating the whole damn thing. I just couldn't imagine trying to reheat the leftovers, and I couldn't resist those feelings of warmth and comfort the pie evoked.

Pathetic, non? But, hey, I guess that's why pies are so popular this time of year. Waaaay back when, women in household kitchens made pies as a special treat for a holiday. The baking and eating of those pies instilled cherished memories that have been recreated to be shared from generation to generation. So what if my pie memories focus more on Bisquick than sweet, gooey fillings and crusts painstakingly rolled out with rolling pins that served both as kitchen utensils and sabers for the proverbial saber-rattling! It's all good.