The Biking Misadventures of a Faudie

You may recall, Gentle Reader, that the boy learned to ride his bike sans training wheels shortly before Mother's Day, which was an incredible triumph for both him and me. Since then, we've put in a lot of time on the bikes and will probably continue to do so throughout the summer.

You may recall as well, Gentle Reader, that I'm a Spinner. It's not my most favorite thing I do at the gym, but I do enjoy it and its benefits. It's made me a much better rider, which has its positives and negatives. One of those negatives: I've learned the joy of the upstroke, and I miss it when I'm not clipped into a Spin bike, such as when I'm out and about on my bike. When the boys and I are out and about, we make our way up a fair number of inclines (Austin is part of the Hill Country in a way), and I miss having my upstroke then especially.

So what's a recreational-but-enthusiastic-and-fit biker to do? Why, switch up pedals so she can somehow secure herself to them and therefore claim her upstroke, of course! But that simple fix does have one caveat in my case: I need to be able to dismount quickly in case the boy has an accident. I love my Spin shoes, but getting unclipped quickly on the bikes at the gym is just not possible. I also can't exactly wear my Spin shoes out and about because (1) I may need to run to get to the boy, and Spin shoes are not for running and (2) Spin shoes aren't really made for general wearing. For these reasons, I ruled out SPD pedals for my bike.

My only choice, it seemed, was a set of cage attachments or these things called Power Grips, which looked really promising as a quick-release option. Unfortunately, getting either solution onto my pedals wasn't as simple as buying a pair and attaching them. No, my cheap bike came with cheap pedals that did not have detachable front reflectors, which meant they had no holes into which to screw the cages or Grips. So step #1 for my pedal upgrade was finding pedals that fit my old, cheap bike--I was learning quickly how cheap and how old it was, although the Huffy I bought back in '94 at ALCO never struck me as cheap and old--and that task proved to be more difficult than I anticipated.

Pedals, Pedals Everywhere But Not a Pair to Fit
I started my quest at the Performance Bicycle shop in South Austin on our way home from our misadventure at the veloway. I tried to explain my situation, but eventually I had to have the clerk come out and look at my bike. He took one look and muttered something about a single-arm crank and special order. Special order sounded expensive, which I was not in the market for, so I thanked him and left.

A few days later, I hauled my bike to a place closer to home, Bicycle Sports Shop. Initially the clerk helping me tried to sell me a set of 9/16" pedals, but when another clerk went to put them on, he realized they were the wrong size. No, my bike needs 1/2" pedals, I learned that day. Luckily, the shop had some BMX-style pedals that fit, so off I went with them installed.

While the new pedals did have a better grip, they did not have the necessary holes for attaching the Power Grips, which I acquired the same day at the Performance Bicycle shop closer to home. Bugger!

After doing some research and calling around, I discovered University Cyclery had pedals in the size I needed. Woohoo! Two days after acquiring the BMX pedals and the Power Grips, I made my way to a third shop to acquire another set of pedals. I explained my needs to the clerk at University, and he said he heard bad things about the Power Grips from local riders who'd tried them. Based on his advice and on my in-shop test of the Grips' mounting bracket with the pedals I'd found at the store, I determined I was probably going to be better off with the cages. So I bought a pair of them along with the pedals.

That evening, the husband kindly installed the new pedals, all tricked out with the cages. I went for a test ride and noticed immediately that the pedals seemed...off. They almost seemed to wobble under my feet, and I wasn't sure if they just weren't installed improperly or if my upstroke motion was causing the wobbling sensation. The husband took the bike for a spin and confirmed the off-kilter feeling of the pedals.

A Return and a Revelation
Since I had to return the Power Grips to Performance, I decided yesterday to haul my bike along when I made the return so I could get someone in the service department to take a look at the new pedals in the hopes that he or she could determine the problem. Sure enough, the rather gruff (bordering on dismissive and rude) service person quickly told me the pedals were the wrong size and that I needed 9/16" pedals. I tried to explain to him why I had 1/2" pedals, and he barked a few things, so eventually I just decided I'd avoid a testy situation and began nodding my head a lot and playing dumb. (The blonde hair really helps sell that routine.)

What came out of that conversation was this: Because we'd installed the wrong-size, higher-quality pedals crooked (not through any fault of the husband's, mind you, Gentle Reader) on my cheap-ass bike, we'd probably stripped the threads on the crank arms, thus probably making it impossible for even the original cheap-ass pedals to go back on. In short: In my attempts to make minor upgrades, I'd probably rendered my bike unrideable, for the crooked pedals twerked my knees, and I don't need any additional twerking 'o my knees, thank you very much.

Le sigh.

On top of that, Dairy Queen had already switched its Blizzard of the Month flavor, so my plan for one final raspberry-chocolate truffle Blizzard. Dammit! Could my day get any worse?

No, Gentle Reader, I didn't ask that of the universe. I didn't want to tempt fate.

Fortunately, the husband was able to get the new pedals off and the old, cheap pedals back on fairly securely, so at least the bike was rideable.

What Else You Can Buy on Craigslist Besides Sex
The universe, in its infinite wisdom, did open a door for me despite the bike woes it had sent my way. I hopped on Craigslist's local bike sales listings late in the afternoon just to browse selection and prices. Sure, my old, cheap bike was rideable, but for how long?

Happily, someone late in the afternoon posted an ad for a Specialized Hardrock 17" mountain bike that was at least 8 years old and in pretty good condition for a pretty decent price. After doing a bit of research, I figured I'd send a query about its availability. And then spent the rest of the evening glued to my computer in hopes of getting an email letting me know the bike was still available.

And got up this morning to do it again--when I wasn't cleaning up cat puke, trying hard not to kill Bucket for yet again unraveling part of the blanket I'm knitting for the boy (granted, it was my own fault for leaving it in a place where he could get to it), hanging out with the kittens outside, kickboxing, mowing the lawn, removing the pavers from the west side of the driveway and, finally, showering. Around 11:30, I got my rear in gear to make the final batch of returns: the BMX pedals to Bicycle Sports Shop and the other pedals and cages to University.

While at Bicycle Sports Shop, I asked one of the clerks to help me determine what size bike frame I needed. Boy oh boy, talk about an education I got! No, I'm not being sarcastic there, Gentle Reader. I really did learn a lot.

And I also made the mistake of trying out a really, really sweet fitness hybrid model from Trek and falling head over heels in love with it. I knew I shouldn't have even done that after seeing the price tag--$640, which is way beyond my price range--but I really was curious to know how it felt to ride a bike that the numbers indicated was the right size for me. Perhaps that's why I felt so hard so fast: Riding that Trek FX was a dream come true for my cranky QL and crotchety hip flexors. The bike also was incredibly light-weight: Parmer Dude weighs more than that bike.

I fell so hard for it that, as I drove away, I was contemplating how I could get the bike through Trek's financing plan (i.e., credit card with one-year payment deferred opportunity) without the husband knowing the true cost of the bike. Pathetic, non? That's almost like having an affair with another person!

After saying a heart-breaking adieu to the Trek, I hauled arse to University to return the pedals and cages. I browsed the bikes at that store, but I didn't find anything that screamed out to me, "I'm comparable to the one you fell in love with but at a fraction of the price!"

As I was making my way home, my cell phone rang: It was the Hardrock seller! Woohoo! After getting some directions, I whipped a U and headed to his (incredibly nice) house to check out his bike. Even as I drove his way, I was doubting his boke would work. After all, it was a 17" frame (if I read the information right last night) and I seemed to be best suited for a 20" unisex frame (the size of my Trek dream bike).

Then the seller answered his door and stepped his roughly 6' 3" body outside. Yeah, I realized in a nanosecond, if this guy can ride that bike, sure as shit I should be able to, bum QL, knees, hip flexors and everything!

I took it for a spin without lowering the seat, still adjusted for his roughly 6' 3" body and knew within seconds this bike would work just fine. I handed over the cash I'd wisely stopped by an ATM to retrieve, he helped me with the quick-release attachments on the front wheel to get the thing loaded in my trusty Fit and I was off to home, much later than anticipated when I'd left at 11:30 but feeling much better about my biking situation.


Yeah, sure, it's school bus yellow, but it's a great ride. Also, it's a fraction of the weight of my old bike (seen behind New Yellow in the photo); I can lift the thing with one hand--sweet! I might need to replace the tubes as the seller suggested, but I'm going to wait and see how they do. I also need to take off the attachment/base piece for the Krytponite U-lock the seller had attached but had unfortunately lost the key for it, install a second water bottle holder (now all three of us can have water when we ride!) and put my underseat first aid kit on.

Will I attach cages? I dunno. The pedals are the right kind, and I have to admit I feel kinda silly having returned the ones to University--but how was I to know I'd have a new bike within an hour of returning them? I'm just going to relax and enjoy my new ride and see how it goes.